My Kids Won't Listen...Help!

[sealily]

I'm very new to witchcraft and I am practising with sigils. I am a nanny and my 3 kids do not listen to me. Is it wrong to create a sigil to have them listen to me? I don't want to do something harmful, please let me know your thoughts.

[Becks]

Hi Sealily, I know the mods will ask you to first please introduce yourself. So please do because we like to get to know people.

I do not have children, but I work in the field and have worked to support all kinds of children with exceptionalities and special needs as well. I spent 3+ years in a specialized program where we supported children (and their families) with extreme behavioural support needs. These techniques almost always work.

First, I would like to say that I'm not judging you as a parent and I don't know anything about your style or how you handle situations. I also don't know the age of the children.

If directions and requests are not being heard, then you might have to invest some more time in simplifying and going back to basics. In this case make sure children are rewarded for listening, and not rewarded for doing the wrong thing. Again, I don't want to guess what things look like for you because I don't know. Can you be a bit more specific? Do you find yourself repeating "no" a million times then your "no" has lost its meaning?

If children do things against your wishes and there are no natural (but not cruel) consequences then they sure aren't going to listen. I think parenting is the world's hardest job, and I have nothing but respect. I meet parents all the time saying similar things, but then I see that they might be stuck in a pattern because they are tired or stressed where they give into a child because it is easier and they just don't have the time or energy to "battle". This kind of scenario, again I don't know what yours is, ends up being much harder in the long run.

One example would be when I was working with a girl with autism she loved to be outside, but she had to learn not to bolt and how to walk safely. I'd give her lots of support and set her up for success, but if she wasn't listening to me or was running off-we went inside. The natural consequence of being unsafe outside was that we went inside. She could get upset and frustrated, but she had been warned and I was always very clear about what 'safe' behaviours were. When she blew it that was it-we went inside. This took a bit of time, but before long she knew what was expected and we had no problems. If her behaviour was heading in the wrong direction I could giver her a friendly positive reminder about what she n ended to be doing, and that was enough...because she knew what I said would happen.

Knowing about the power of transitions can be a huge help. Few people like them....and they can be really hard for children.

It's the same with a toy or iPad or whatever. Children like lots of warning, be clear with how much time they have (at any activity to start) then based on knowing the child (helps you to know how much transition time is ideal) let them know a transition is happening, "five more minutes and them iPad time is over". Then let them know time's up, and that's it. They give over the object or whatever, if not, then no desired object until they earn it.

It also shows children that you respect them. I am not implying that you don't respect your chillins!

If you are consistent, then they know your word is "THE WORD". If you are inconsistent then you will have a scenario where young people know they are in charge and can do whatever. It's hard work. That's why parents are amazing people.

So, In a long winded way of answering your question, I think your answer lies in the mundane and not in sigil making.

[Kassandra]

I'm very new to witch craft and I am practising with sigils. I am a nanny and my 3 kids do not listen to me. Is it wrong to create a sigil to have them listen to me? I don't want to do something harmful, please let me know your thoughts.

Ooo, this is a good question. I'll have to think on this one. What would I do in your shoes? By the way, all of us have different approaches to witchcraft here. We're not all Wiccans, though many here are. In fact, often our ideas are diametrically-opposed to one another, which I personally think is quite cool!!...no cookie-cutter bs here. So, don't put all your eggs into one basket in the responses you get. Weigh them out, and go with what resonates with you.



Freezer Spell

Personally, "sigil" wasn't the first thing to pop up in my mind regarding a solution to this problem. Maybe someone else could speak on that. Freezer spell to "chill them out" (calm them down) was my knee-jerk thought, instead. It's not an unkind spell, it just slows down or suspends the erratic energy of a situation. It's also good for, say, argumentative or gossipy people. Just write their names on a piece of paper, cross your name over it several times (usually it's 9), put the name paper in a small container (some people use an ice tray, but I like my ice tray to be for ice, not magic), and freeze it in the freezer. Speak your intention as you do this. You could use a small container that you reserve for magical purposes. Freezer spells can get a lot more complicated than this, but this is it in a nutshell.




Poppet

Then, the next thought I thought was "poppet." That is a little doll that represents someone. From my research, it originates in Old European magical tradition, though Hollywood has given them press as "voodoo dolls." Some poppets are actually made of bread. But, for your little tykes I see simple cloth ones that you could reuse. I envisioned you making three of them, "baptising" each one with the name of the child (baptism is a ritual that waaaay predates Christianity, by the way), and then talking to them in the morning each day before you go to your job... "Now Billy, I told you not to touch that flower pot yesterday, and it ended up falling on your foot, remember? I am trying to keep you all safe and happy. Work with me on this. Help me help you. I need you to listen to me today, OK?" etc. I kind of like the poppet idea, since these are children, and dolls are associated with children. The poppets can be your little spiritual babies.




Poppet Divination

Here's what's really interesting. After a time, as you interact with the poppets, you might also get "messages," or intuitive hits about what will occur that day regarding the child to whom the poppet correlates. When this happens, you could prepare ahead of time to handle whatever comes up. No joke, I had a job where I did this in the morning, and sure enough what I intuited that morning would occur that day! Instead of poppets, I did this with live herb plants from my herb garden, odd as that sounds. Each plant was assigned to each person in my office. This wasn't my idea. At the time, this Celtic Druid, red-haired teacher lady would pop up and teach me things. I knew nothing about formal magic. She just taught me how to do things like read tarot, divine information, etc. It was a really trippy time of my life.


I would be happy to answer any questions you have about any of this that I have written, sealily. I love it when people try to find practical purposes for using magic. It's better than, "Hi Kassandra. Could you tell me a spell that'll make me levitate? [or] ..make fire come out of my palms?," etc. ugh. Lol


The best.




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[Wandering Warlock]

Is it wrong to create a sigil to have them listen to me?

I'd say that since you're here asking, yes it's wrong. If you were convinced it weren't, you wouldn't need validation, and when it comes to a situation like this what matters most is what you think of it. If within your deep mind you already know it's wrong, that's going to bleed over into any other intention you might put forth.

And anyway, the minds of children are far too flexible to fall victim to any spell you might try to put on them. They adapt far better than adults, who are set in their ways and more easily manipulated. Why else do you think the kids are getting the best of you?

Best of luck!

[Vendredi]

Is it wrong to create a sigil to have them listen to me?

I'd say that since you're here asking, yes it's wrong. If you were convinced it weren't, you wouldn't need validation, and when it comes to a situation like this what matters most is what you think of it. If within your deep mind you already know it's wrong, that's going to bleed over into any other intention you might put forth.

And anyway, the minds of children are far too flexible to fall victim to any spell you might try to put on them. They adapt far better than adults, who are set in their ways and more easily manipulated. Why else do you think the kids are getting the best of you?

Best of luck!

I agree.

And reading your query, I'm under the impression that these are children that you have been hired to take care of? As a parent AND a childcare provider that makes me SO uncomfortable. Becks gave very valuable advice to you.

If you really feel spellwork will solve your problems, work on yourself. A spell for patience, perhaps? A spell for insight and knowledge?

[sealily]

Thank you, I am not going to attempt any type of magick to have them listen to me or to do with them at all. I didn't think it was the best idea but worth asking none the less.

[blue_moon]

As basics I recommend janet lansbury and the books written by faber & mazlish.

Kids ... living and working with them - can be really frustrating. But always remember they are growing and their mind and understanding of things if changing from day to day. You can only teach them by teaching. Not through magick

[Kassandra]

And reading your query, I'm under the impression that these are children that you have been hired to take care of? As a parent AND a childcare provider that makes me SO uncomfortable.

Totally agree on this. Though I wrote the above soley from the OP's perspective, from a parent perspective what I wrote above is kind of creepy, lol. I mean, I understand someone wanting to make their work day easier, and be more efficient and feel more harmonious with job tasks, etc. But there is something intrusive about the thought of someone doing spell work on my kid, even if it was meant well.


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[mangosandy82]

I don't think magic of any kind would help you in this situation. I would sit the kids down and have a talk with them about listening. If they don't listen to you then tell them that there will be some consequences. Like no TV or take away their play time. Try sitting them in a time out if they don't listen. I hope this helps. Also be sure to ask the parents of the kids if it's okay to do this.