Am I Too Hopeful?
Posted: Wed Oct 12, 2016 3:36 pm
I am dating this guy. Have been for almost 5 years now. When I started falling for him, something in me said he was who I was supposed to be with forever. He was my other half. I was his.
Well our relationship has been rocky at best, and on a downhill slope straight to hell at worst. We have been trying to make things work, but we still fight a lot. And I feel like we're getting worse. Lately I've been questioning whether we really were meant for each other and having a lot of "what if" scenarios play out in my head where I never talked to him when I saw him that first time.Then last night I had this dream.
We were back in high school. It was his first day. Instead of trying to talk to him, I avoided him. (My dream self knew what we'd be in for if he and I got together) We had some event in the gym, and he ended up sitting two rows below me next to a girl I'd vaguely known. He made small talk with her and me. Then the event started. Then he and the girl started hard core making out. Even though I tried to keep history from repeating itself, I still loved him, and found it painful to stay and continue to watch what they were doing. I left the gym for the safety of the library.
While at the library, I began picking out books to read. I left them in a stack on the end of the shelf I was browsing. Suddenly my jaw and gums hurt. I left the library forgetting my books and went to the nurse's office where one of my teeth proceeded to fall out. The nurse took me back and a dentist showed up and lectured me about not brushing while another of my teeth fell out. I have a phobia of losing my teeth. Needless to say this really upset me. I left the nurse's office no longer in pain, but very upset because my teeth had fallen out.
Standing outside in the hallway, He was there....holding the books I'd wanted to check out. He told me he saw me picking them out and then get rushed to the nurse's office and that he knew I still wanted to read the books. I felt instantly better and sorry for not talking to him earlier. We ended up dating in my dream too.
Does this mean we are meant to be? That I'm right? Or is it just wishful thinking on my part?
Well our relationship has been rocky at best, and on a downhill slope straight to hell at worst. We have been trying to make things work, but we still fight a lot. And I feel like we're getting worse. Lately I've been questioning whether we really were meant for each other and having a lot of "what if" scenarios play out in my head where I never talked to him when I saw him that first time.Then last night I had this dream.
We were back in high school. It was his first day. Instead of trying to talk to him, I avoided him. (My dream self knew what we'd be in for if he and I got together) We had some event in the gym, and he ended up sitting two rows below me next to a girl I'd vaguely known. He made small talk with her and me. Then the event started. Then he and the girl started hard core making out. Even though I tried to keep history from repeating itself, I still loved him, and found it painful to stay and continue to watch what they were doing. I left the gym for the safety of the library.
While at the library, I began picking out books to read. I left them in a stack on the end of the shelf I was browsing. Suddenly my jaw and gums hurt. I left the library forgetting my books and went to the nurse's office where one of my teeth proceeded to fall out. The nurse took me back and a dentist showed up and lectured me about not brushing while another of my teeth fell out. I have a phobia of losing my teeth. Needless to say this really upset me. I left the nurse's office no longer in pain, but very upset because my teeth had fallen out.
Standing outside in the hallway, He was there....holding the books I'd wanted to check out. He told me he saw me picking them out and then get rushed to the nurse's office and that he knew I still wanted to read the books. I felt instantly better and sorry for not talking to him earlier. We ended up dating in my dream too.
Does this mean we are meant to be? That I'm right? Or is it just wishful thinking on my part?