Everything Under the Moon

Okay, I will tell the story first and give a bit of background too.

I just left my boyfriend, whom I was in an abusive relationship with. He basically screwed me over really hardcore throughout the relationship I got so depressed and disinterested in life, and started drinking and doing drugs more and more often and become less and less of myself. Not to mention getting thousands of dollars in debt over him convincing me that we needed certain things that were to be bought with my credit, which as completely wrecked my credit rating and I am only almost 23. Then I started practicing Wicca, and lo and behold it made him very angry and upset, and then I realized that if he loved me, he would accept that, and he wanted NOTHING to do with it, called me crazy, etc. I think what scared him most that he saw, although maybe he didn't fully understand what he was witnessing, that I was getting stronger and stronger emotionally and mentally as I began practicing. I started with using crystals and I guess he thought those were pretty harmless until I started bringing books on Wicca home and by then the crystals had done their magic on me and I feel like there was no stopping the momentum and energy I've gained. I guess you could say that magick has save my life, because I've been so intoxicated, so many times that a girl I hardly even know told me, "if you keep going like this and don't get ahold of your life, you are going to die."
Then I was on this website (and this was only a week and a half ago) looking at a spell to, I kid you not, break up with someone. Well, it worked, and I left him the next morning. He "kicked me out," which my room mate described as "the greatest opportunity he's ever allowed [me], so take it and ride it."

And now here I am again, single, at my parents and about to move in with a really amazing friend who is also really spiritual and couldn't be more happy or excited to see how this year will unfold.

But now here is my little problem:
There is someone I just met a little while but already feel the energy connection between us as really strong. When I am around him, and even as I am writing this I feel my solar plexus tightening...
He intrigues me so much because he is not the type of guy I would normally go for. I initiated the conversation because my friends brought me out to meet all these people because I have just moved back to my hometown, and for some reason I felt most comfortable with him, so I sat next to him, and so it began. The only guy I've ever met who wears tight leather pants, a septum ring and a style all his own, while not being all emo about it, but making it sort of sexy and manly all at the same time .
But anyways the energy I felt from him right away made me feel really safe and we ended up leaving our friends to go get food and come back and while we were gone we talked and connected in a really rare and awesome way. While this happened, I was still with my boyfriend so we exchanged numbers that day promising to hang out as friends, with one of our mutual friends because we both felt like we had sort of bonded over our little adventure together. This is the guy that I know the least, but I feel so crazy over, so my concern is when it does happen (I have this strong feeling that something will eventually), I want to feel safe in that it's wise for both of us (he just got out of a relationship of similar pain). I just really want to like him because he's a really good person and I am attracted genuinely to his qualities and feel really drawn to him spiritually (which I realized is a MUST for me), not just jumping on to the next thing.

I just feel like I lack control over my feelings for people sometimes, especially right now, and this is why I got involved with such a toxic person to begin with. But I have a way of always attracting people to me, its some mystical talent I have to be able to talk to whoever I want and make them interested in me also, and because I know how to do it, I sometimes do it subconsciously also making people think I like them more than I really do. Causing that person to act, and then me doing something I later regret.

What can I do to protect myself from being hurt again, AND from hurting the people that I am getting close to, without ruling out romantic possibility with this guy, or anyone else? I know that if I have my way, I might act in a way that is not healthy for me all over again, and I really don't want this to happen.

And if you've read this far, then sincerely, thank you. I always write a lot more that I realize I am :3

First of all, I'm so very sorry for your experience and I applaud you for getting the strength to get out so quickly. I was in a similar, though less harrowing experience three years ago, and I know the strength it must have taken you.

As to your question.. I have to recommend that you tread lightly. I don't know this guy from a hole in the ground, but I do know what you're feeling right now and I think it's easy to pin our hopes on a prince charming and even when he's riding a sasquatch, we see a big furry white horse.

I think the best thing you can do is really talk to him about this. Tell him the way you're feeling, but also tell him that at this point in your life, as a matter of survival, you really have to go slow.

On the spell side of things, I would think you could probably do a spell to try to protect your heart, but I wouldn't rush into that without knowing the particular spell. If you really do have an interest in this man, that could block you off, I think. I'm sure these other ladies know a lot more, I'm still new to witchcraft.

I hope things go well with you, you seem like a very sweet person that was dealt a not so nice hand, and if I can help you with anything, feel free to PM me.