Witches and relationships

[RosieMoonflower]

Ann, I'm so sorry you were treated that way. I feel like this would happen to me of I was more public than I am. My fiancés family is über conservative, though he is not. And he also has/had a jealous ex, but that's another story. The fiancé got me a Buddha statue for Christmas that I opened in front of his family. This promoted his cousin to say "you know what the bible says about having that in your house, right?"... Geez.. So I almost rattled off "no Keisha, what does it say?" To watch her stumble for the exact words.. But the fiancé beat me to it. "It's also says don't eat shrimp." I could tell this made his mother sooo uncomfortable. I could tell she was blaming me for pointing out to him the flaws of the man made bible. She is soooo passive aggressive that it didn't come out, but I could tell. She was next to me on the couch and she started inching away from me to the other side, and she just had that nervous uncomfortable look on her. I also don't identify as a witch because of this. I'm too new to know if Wicca and witchcraft are for me, but divination is why I came to this forum, which is a form a witchcraft. However, I think this negative perspective I know his family will take has left me searching for another word to describe what I do with tarot cards, crystals, etc. Something that is not in the bible so they cannot condemn me. Also, the fiancé and I have purchased a new home, should be in Feb 10. So I'm hoping to make one of the spare rooms my "hobby" room. I'll keep my sewing machine and guitar in there, but I would also like to create a alter to meditate in front of. Again, I'm hoping I can call it something other than an alter. I fear too manny people will interpret an alter to mean worshiping of Gods, and though I don't proclaim to be a Christian and I enjoy exploring other religions, the only God I pray to is the same God I've been praying to since I was a child, as well as Jesus, and God's angels, which I don't see any Christians having a problem with. But I know that the terminology "witch" and "alter" have one meaning and one meaning only to them and it will be an issue if they visit and see my alter with something other than a cross on it. I really haven't gotten into spells and rituals and such because I don't have a safe place to explore it. So I am looking forward to my new "hobby room". I can go there and close the door and learn for myself without being judged.

[River SilverWolf]

I have been married a little over 13 years and my husband knows. He is a skeptic of everything but respects my beliefs. I also am a paranormal investigator and while he doesn't believe in ghosts he will buy me toys and gadgets to use for investigations and supports my hobby. As for the Pagan side, my best friend is also Pagan and that helps. My mom also knows and despite her catholic upbringing she has always been open minded. She grew up in a haunted house in Chicago so she is always been open to spiritual and paranormal things. In fact she came by and spent some time at my booth this past year at DFW Pagan Pride Day where I was selling my jewelry as a vendor! She was a good sport and even had her tarot cards read.
However on the flip side i have kept that side quiet from my inlaws. They are very closed minded and even my husband recommends they don't know.
The way i see it, my beliefs and religious practices are for me and my relationship to deity. I don't need to shout from the rooftops "I'm a witch! Go Paganism!" I am happy with my private relationship with the Goddess and God.
Not to say I don't honor them, i just do a bit more discretely. I wear a simple crescent moon although i do have a silver pentacle as well as a celtic moon with a star inside that doesn't look like a pentacle so much but is. (I live in the bible belt and have 2 kids in elementary school. so i like to keep things low key).
In environments where it's accepted like a Pagan Pride Day gathering or a metaphysical shop i'll wear my pentacle. I'm not ashamed of my beliefs, i just don't flaunt it.
My husband has been supportive and doesn't mind that i have a few areas designated for sacred space in our home. In my closet area I have my magickal books, candles, and tools. I also keep my private mini altar space there as well. All he asked is that i don't burn incense as he hates the smell lol! (Which is okay as I have asthma and we have pet birds too). However I was able to compromise and burn soy scented candles near my bath tub! <3
I think if you have someone who is open minded you should be okay. I honestly haven't heard or seen anyone who is a witch or pagan and has a Christian partner work out. It's sad but the truth is there isn't much tolerance in Christianity for others beliefs that don't mirror theirs. If you find someone who feels they are a Christian Witch you might work out but when you have such polar opposites with religion it can be tough. I agree with other posters though you have to e honest with your partner. My husband and I have no secrets and are happily married for over 13 years.
On a side note however i haven't openly discussed this with my kids. They are 6 and (almost) 10. I haven't hid anything but haven't offered the information. They see pentacles and stars, they see mommy's herbs and flowers, and know i have a lot of gemstones etc. It's hard at this age as I know my kids can't keep secrets to save their lives! lol! i'm not worried about how they would see me, but i would worry that my beliefs could affect the kids they play with. The other kids parents might freak if they found out and then not allow the kids to play. (I live in the bible belt...)
When they are older and start asking questions i'll be honest about what i believe.
Both my kids show pagan - nature tendencies already. My oldest has a deep connection to animals i haven't seen other kids do. She can connect and calm animals and has a patience not usual for her age. My youngest is a bit more wild but she has a connection with the spirits. When she was only a little over a year old she was talking to her Uncle Mark and giving us messages.

[MsMollimizz]

I was (am?) a wild child, emancipated at 16yrs old I hitch-hiked across the country
for quite a few years; 'til I found the carnival...still I partied hard ! That's how I met
my hubby, he was my connect. We use to have metaphysical conversations 'til the wee
hours in the morning. That was fun...
When we moved down to this desert to help his Mom and Sis pay rent, it all changed.
He started going to church with them, so I needless to say went also.
It was in that house I was introduced to the internet in '98, I was hooked ! I found
out I wasn't as near alone as I thought I was, hooray ! We could only handle living
there for 3yrs...his Mom was a control-freak (wonder where he gets it?). The first
ones I found online were those who practiced Native American beliefs: Lynn Andrews
and such...
Hubby starting making little noises when I started talking metaphysical stuff, he no
longer cared to share those conversations... Left his Mom's place to a trailer the
manager of trailer park gave us so they would have rent coming in from that spot.
That was a mistake ! We fought constantly...for 2yrs over nit-pik stuff. Then the
trailer park was sold and the new owners were moving in trailers for people to buy.
Started going around looking at tag to make sure they are current ! Oh no ! We had
no paperwork on that trailer, and the woman who did would not let loose of it. It
became a trailer park people owned theirs, no renters. My hubby got a wild idea,
we can move to my motorhome and Uncle's trailer in his backyard in '02
I felt like we were going backwards ! That's when I found the Pagan sites, wheeee !
He got pissy about me wanting to get two books on herbs and what they help
in the body. I guess uncle got tired of fights too
Moved into the ghetto apt. I found the pagan sites, oh happy day ! I'm really in
my zone now ! Met a fellow pagan on a message board come to find out she only
lived 5mi from me ! We talked awhile online, you know, feeling each other out...
We met face-to-face on Samhain, how fitting ! In '02 I was looking for a way to
pay for my books since we were only living on his small retirement. I found the
online surveys, hooray books for me, and jewelry, friend got me stalked up on
herbs, we share books and the like. The Yucca plant in the desert has a nice sturdy
stalk for the flowers that gets bigger each year; and they are hollow ! I found a
nice one that was already down and dried, I made my wand and my friend made
one out of the other half; I guess you could say they are twins but her's looks
nothing like mine. And hubby gets upset when I'd spend the night at her place
(still does), like he can't get along without me ! I was still fighting ss, fought them
for 10yrs ! Finally approved, we can actually live and breathe, and life was calmer.
He didn't want any of my ss mess to do anything about him. It don't work that way.
What I got depended on how much he got. Then during a phone interview he cussed
the local ss office over the phone(do you know who I was talking to? That's right,
the one office he cussed) They started changing my file around, I have not received
a check since that occurred grrrr !
He told me from the beginning, his whole family has had heart-attacks, his Mom
had 5, and told me not to be surprised. He had gotten to the point a time or two
and asked me if I could help him
He gets me so mad at times...blood turn black, skin turn blue, I'll curse you if you
force me too ! *wicked laugh*
He can be nice if he wants, and gets some sleep ! I think that's a lot of the problem;
he'll lay down at 9pm and he's up to pee about 2am and stays up. I'd like to knock
him out when he don't sleep.
But I'm really disappointed we no longer have the metaphysical talks, the whatever
will be will be talks and the like. He'd preferred it if I didn't talk to him about any
of this.
Could being around his Mom for awhile cause the flip in believing ? He use to say
if he walked in a church the roof would fall on him ! I'm amazed I've let him live
these last 18yrs !
This is my 3rd marriage, and the last man I'll have in my bed for longer than
a night after he's gone ! Men are just too much a hassle, at least the ones I've
been with !
So I guess I'm saying...they may say one thing, don't always mean it !
This wicked witch is back ! *even more wicked laugh*
I've been Pagan since I was 13yrs old, their God didn't help me when I needed
it so I went looking elsewhere ! I found Goddess Diana out my bedroom window,
Gentle Indigo Light
MsMollimizz